ADD-Apt or get out!

3 09 2010

I had this brilliant idea that, as is often the case, started out as a joke. I stated on facebook that I was going to start a website called ADD-Verse for ADHD poets to publish their work. The idea was taken seriously so the site was begun.

A similar situation arose from the lack of ADD coaches and support groups in this area. I started thinking a company could be formed and ADHDers could pay to share coaches and have client meetings as a sort of support group thing. Of course I thought of a clever name – ADD-Apt – but then I thought it could be bigger than just coaching and support. It could have financial services like, your pay from whatever you do goes directly into your account but you have no access to it. ADD-Apt pays your rent, your utilities, buys your groceries, maybe your clothes (lots of orange and purple fabrics), makes some investments on your behalf and gives you an allowance.

Then I started to think, what better investment than property? And why not have the ADHDers live in an ADD-Apt owned building while the place is being paid off. Everyone’s utilities are covered, everyone gets internet access from the same connection. If the place is big enough there could be a restaurant, a grocery store, and best of all, a common storage area where we could all have piles of things we impulse bought and we could, like, swap them with each other. There would be “normans” (normal humans) around, of course, to do the coaching and bill paying and investing etc. But they’d have to have a sense of humour before we’d hire them (are there any normans with a sense of humour?)

And since we’re running the place, as in hiring and firing support staff, why not expand it to be a community? Now I’m really starting to like this idea, Buildings would be painted plaid, sidewalks would go straight for two hundred feet then veer off towards a garden or a lake shore or a coffee bar and then swing back to the side of the road, everywhere you looked there would be really good climbing trees and bicycles would be lying around for anyone’s use.

Of course the heart breaking part would be the children. I imagine some would be born without the benefit of ADHD and then, once they turned eighteen, if they didn’t qualify as support staff they would have to be shipped off to “Normanton” or wherever they would be welcome. Cruel to keep them here in ADDville, nothing for them to do, no other friends around, poor or nonexistent opportunities for boring types of education.

I suppose, with all our abilities, we could contrive to have an enclave of services and resources for normans who wanted to stay in our community.

It would actually benefit the support staff we’d hired as well. We could have internet cafes that catered to people who could only deal with having one chat at a time, movie theatres that showed flicks that didn’t require any great imaginative leaps to follow the plot, stores where they could do their own shopping and banks where they could pay their bills so that they wouldn’t feel like their awkward little collection of organizational skills was “different”.

Now that I think further along this line, I’m sure, once word got out about how much fun it was for normans to live here, they’d all want in. We could just let them, I suppose, what harm can they do. They are good at maintaining infrastructure, whatever that is, and they could be useful in other ways, and god knows there’s a lot of them, so they wouldn’t be lonely anymore.

So, I’ve decided, we’ll have a world, mostly populated with normans, with ourselves running things quietly in the background, so they don’t realize they’re being managed (they’re so sensitive about stuff like that). Hey, wait a minute … that’s what we have now! Damn, we live in a perfect world. *Sigh*




2 responses

3 09 2010
Zoë's ADHD Pet Peeves: Actually, Kelly's Pet Peeve | ADHD from A to Zoë

[…] by guest blogger, Kelly Babcock. You can check out more of Kelly’s blogs at his own blogsite, Tao of Taylor. Thanks, Kelly, for sharing your Pet Peeve with us this […]

27 10 2010

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